What do you tell friends and family when they ask how much bitcoin you have?

I’ve been telling and basically begging everyone I know for the past three years to buy bitcoin. The majority of them just laughed, or ignored me, or tried to be polite and didn’t do anything. Now obviously with the run up, I am getting asked more and more how much bitcoin I have. How do you guys respond?

I wanna be friendly and not a dick, taking the high road. At the same time, I don’t want everybody knowing how much bitcoin I have.