Seed Phrase Saving Technique

I'm sure I'm not the first one to think of this but could anyone please counter/debunk my idea: I most likely am. I would like to save my seedphrase on the cloud using multiple levels of encryption.

>Memory/Ancecdote: This most important layer being memory/anecdotes where for example if a word is 'Charge' I write something like

 First three letters of my father's oldest uncle ( who is called Charlie)/Last three letters are the country where I went on exchange: How it appears on tv in english on a football match but unscramble it. So to decrypt it would be: Cha from Charlie and G-e-r in any order. I would get charge. 

>Non English language: Just reducing chances

I will skip this layer here to avoid misunderstanding 

>Intentionally misspelling: So that machines (yet) dont pick up on language and make sensoe of it

Phurst thuree leters af my fathhers eldest onkel..... 

>Simple math based encryption: TO avoid the text being understood by any human reader of any language as something sound

Phurst thuree.... P->Q h->i u->v etc. sentence appearing as ""Phurst thuree" appearing as "Qivtu uisff...." 

I believe that unless I lose my memory, this is the safest way to store information (in my head). I am much less likely to forget my uncles name, or university country etc. than random words.

​

The reason I am against physical storage is because no matter how safe, it has a greater chance of getting lost or stolen.

​

Please share your knowledge on risks of this method

​

EDIT: Thank you for mostly constructive criticism on this method. I would like to address that because of my work I do have to move around every year or two and don't have a permanent home. Thus safely taking physical notes through airport security checks etc. at least feels unwise. Any of you on the same boat? Secondly I feel like (as some have addressed), hiding stuff in a safe may be dangerous in case of a threat or robbery attempt as the attackers always go for the safe rather than a pile of books for example. Then again, hiding in plain sight is riskier. I do understand that this risk is little to none for many of you.

Most have addressed the fact that storing information in memory is a bad idea long term. Some aspect of memory always required (i.e. where is my seedphrase stored: in a safe, in the office desk etc.). If indeed the issue is about forgetting, would it help in practicing the 'self created encryption' periodically (every year) mitigate the risk?

​

​